Be.YOU.tiful: Self Love and Love of Others
Be.You.tiful by Cyd Marie
With this blog, I would like to talk from the heart. The topic consist of something that hits home but we all see every day. As you can see from the title, that it has something to do with being yourself. I think that this is a very important subject, especially with talking about natural hair and health.
Recently, my mother had to shave her hair off due to thinning/bald spots. This isn't her first time doing so, but it's always been a difficult and sensitive thing for her to do.
Doesn't she look beautiful? Yea I think so too. I get it from my mommy, lol. However, two woman felt to take it upon themselves to make fun of her and her hair. Rude and disrespectful, right? EXTREMELY!! These women do not know my mother or what she is going through or what she been through, so why would they make fun? There's so much sickness going on, Lord forbid, but they don't know if my mother could of been diagnosed with cancer or something. Yet, they still laughed.
When women who shave their hair off like this, takes a lot of confidence and courage. They are willing to be different and stand out from the crowd. Do they do it to be seen? No, they do it for many reasons, but the main one is for themselves. I have always applauded my mother each time she has shaved her hair off. I feel everyone should too, instead of being so judgmental.
When I first went natural, I was told that I was trying to be like everyone else. That I was following natural hair trend. Also, since my hair wasn't loose waves, my hair was called nappy. But little did these people know, I went natural because I wanted too. I was tired of getting a relaxer one month and a few weeks later it looked like I never even put a relaxer in my head. I was tired of my scalp being chemically burned every time. I was tired of my hair thinning. I was tired of trying to fit in. My mother kept my sister and I hair up. Our hair was long and thick but more importantly HEALTHY. It wasn't until we moved and got in grade school and the kids didn't wear braids like we did and they made fun of us. From that, we told our mother no more braids, we want our hair to look like the other kids. If you were to ask now, we would tell you, we ask our mother all the time now to braid our hair.
Why does this society feel that they should judge or categorize us by the clothes we wear or how many inches we have in our hair or the kind car we drive, etc.? Why can't we inspire, encourage one another? Why do people try their best to fit in and make shame to someone that wants to be outside of the box? Why is it easy to follow the trend but hard to be yourself?
No one is perfect in this world, we all have flaws. No one has the right to judge or make fun of the next person. Being a natural does not mean I disrespect someone that gets relaxer. Everyone has their own preferences of how they want to wear their hair, better yet of how they want to care themselves. Being a natural does not mean I feel I am better or more beautiful than someone. We all are either ugly or beautiful in someone else's eyes but it only matters of what we think of ourselves.
I think India Arie couldn't have said it any better, "I am not my hair. I am not this skin. I am not your expectations. I am not my hair. I am not this skin. I am a soul that lives within."
My advice is to be yourself, don't let anyone (family, friend, stranger or whatever) tell how to live your life, how to dress, how to wear your hair, what job to work, etc. Have and keep confidence within yourself and flaunt it like you're walking down the runway. Look at yourself in the mirror and say "hey, you there. Yes, you! YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL! YOU ARE AMAZING!" and give yourself a kiss. Lol